Alliances verses Walls
I had to write a referral for a student on the bus on his third day of school this year. It was all actually a very simple and silly battle of wills, really. And yet rules are necessary throughout life and the sooner we learn this the better, just as there are always consequences when you do such things as swear a lot and threaten your bus aide and driver with physical injury, or death.
Anyhow, in the conversation with this middle school student I asked him to keep things in perspective. I reminded him that we were setting the tone for the rest of this brand new school year. I told him that we could have a lot of fun on the bus, that I could be his friend, his ally... or else he could choose for us all to be miserable.
I recently started watching the very popular HBO show "Game of Thrones" based on the series of books by George R.R. Martin. In this fantasy world there are several seven kingdoms united as one, except that there are multiple large families who all think their family should be on the throne. People are constantly vying for power, forging alliances, stabbing each other in the back (literally, and metaphorically).
Robb Stark leads his family and the northern kingdom after the unjust execution of his father. Robb leads a campaign to oust the Lannister family from the Iron Throne and make himself king over all seven kingdoms. He has several key families supporting him, he has youth and energy as his allies, and he is miraculously winning battle after battle. Soon he will be able to march on the capitol and exact his revenge, and the Lannisters know it: they are becoming increasingly nervous and threatened, desperate to maintain power...and stay alive.
There is one catch for Robb: he needs access to a key bridge and along with it the kingdom and alliance of Walder Frey and his family and sub-kingdom. Frey is an eccentric old man, loathed by many, and described as arrogant, loathing, sarcastic, lecherous, tyrannical. He is not well-liked and is looked down upon by the higher class, and the lower class often as well.
Walder Frey agrees to join Robb Stark's cause under several stipulations, including that Robb would marry one of Walder's many daughters. The alliance is struck... but Robb is already falling in love with another and chooses to ignore his agreement without even trying to keep it a secret. Of course Walder is not pleased and withdraws his part of the alliance. He already knows how he and his family are looked down upon by so many others, "They're laughing at us! All across the Riverlands... right down to King's Landing, they're laughing at us. I hear it in my sleep! I'm not dead yet, unfortunately for you. And I'll not leave this world until they all choke on that laughter."
Eventually Robb finally realizes that he does, indeed, need the Freys. He begs for forgiveness and a new alliance is struck in which Robb's cousin is to be married off to another of Walder's daughters. Everything seems to be going according to plan as the families gather for the wedding feast, celebrating the new arrangement that will bring them all to victory...
Except Walder Frey has already made a deal with the Lannister family as an act of revenge for his earlier betrayal by Robb Stark. During the wedding feast Walder has the entire Stark family slaughtered. His revenge has seemingly clinched control and power for the Lannisters, and secured his safety with them.
Robb Stark's mother, Catelyn, had warned him to not take Walder Frey lightly, and encouraged him to keep his agreement despite his love for another. She knew that such betrayals would be met with bitter grudges and revenge, that such alliances and deals were what make and break kingdoms. And yet her son chose not to listen to her. Like many others throughout the land he looked down upon Walder Frey and his family, like they were not part of the "popular crowd", the smart or talented, the cool kids. They had something he needed but they were not really important to him as people themselves. And Walder Frey knew it.
What might have happened had Robb kept his word? True, it would have been sad and tragic in its own way had he not married for love. But, ultimately, he, his bride and their unborn child, his mother, multiple other family members, indeed, the majority of House Stark and their army, were wiped out. The "good guys", as we are led to perceive them, are nearly wiped out, and the "bad guy" Lannisters are even more powerful.
Walder Frey had the possibility of being an annoying and eccentric but necessary ally, or else a very dangerous and deadly foe.
I was driving to work the other morning and heard part of a sermon the radio. It was talking about pride and humility. The speaker talked about how we are created and designed to need one another, that we are not meant to do this journey of life on our own strength alone. He described pride as building up walls, separating ourselves from others by saying, "I'm better than them." He described humility as acknowledging that each individual has something that we each need, and humility allows us to say to someone, "You have something that I need."
Pride places all the value on self. Humility places value on others.
Pride builds walls between people. Humility breaks down walls.
The Bible is very clear that God uses the most unexpected of people. The heroes of the Scriptures do not have their acts together, they make mistakes, they are fearful and impatient, often selfish and for sure imperfect. And yet God sees something bigger, deeper, greater in each of them as they choose to let Him work thru them.
We often look at so many people just as Robb Stark looked at Walder Frey. We overlook or reject people because they do not fit into a certain box of what we think we are looking for or who we think we should associate with. We think we know who we can count on or the type of people we should invest in. And yet God looks at every person as someone He can work with, someone that has something someone else needs. God does not see any of us the same as we see one another. He does not rank and value us the way we rank and value potential people in our lives.
Be careful who you overlook or who you reject. They may not be a vicious, vengeful crazy man like Walder Frey, but they most certainly have something to offer and contribute and could make a bigger difference on your journey than you think. They may be the best ally you could hope for if only you will allow them.
In the end, after a few grumpy days of having to sit in the front seat of the bus, my middle school student has a different schedule at school. He now rides the bus at a different time of day when there are no other students aboard. But even so, his attitude is greatly changed and he enjoys chatting with me about upcoming movies. We may have gotten off to a rocky start but I think he realizes now that I was not the villain he thought I was. He has chosen to invest in an ally, rather than erect a wall.
Eventually Robb finally realizes that he does, indeed, need the Freys. He begs for forgiveness and a new alliance is struck in which Robb's cousin is to be married off to another of Walder's daughters. Everything seems to be going according to plan as the families gather for the wedding feast, celebrating the new arrangement that will bring them all to victory...
Except Walder Frey has already made a deal with the Lannister family as an act of revenge for his earlier betrayal by Robb Stark. During the wedding feast Walder has the entire Stark family slaughtered. His revenge has seemingly clinched control and power for the Lannisters, and secured his safety with them.
Robb Stark's mother, Catelyn, had warned him to not take Walder Frey lightly, and encouraged him to keep his agreement despite his love for another. She knew that such betrayals would be met with bitter grudges and revenge, that such alliances and deals were what make and break kingdoms. And yet her son chose not to listen to her. Like many others throughout the land he looked down upon Walder Frey and his family, like they were not part of the "popular crowd", the smart or talented, the cool kids. They had something he needed but they were not really important to him as people themselves. And Walder Frey knew it.
What might have happened had Robb kept his word? True, it would have been sad and tragic in its own way had he not married for love. But, ultimately, he, his bride and their unborn child, his mother, multiple other family members, indeed, the majority of House Stark and their army, were wiped out. The "good guys", as we are led to perceive them, are nearly wiped out, and the "bad guy" Lannisters are even more powerful.
Walder Frey had the possibility of being an annoying and eccentric but necessary ally, or else a very dangerous and deadly foe.
I was driving to work the other morning and heard part of a sermon the radio. It was talking about pride and humility. The speaker talked about how we are created and designed to need one another, that we are not meant to do this journey of life on our own strength alone. He described pride as building up walls, separating ourselves from others by saying, "I'm better than them." He described humility as acknowledging that each individual has something that we each need, and humility allows us to say to someone, "You have something that I need."
Pride places all the value on self. Humility places value on others.
Pride builds walls between people. Humility breaks down walls.
The Bible is very clear that God uses the most unexpected of people. The heroes of the Scriptures do not have their acts together, they make mistakes, they are fearful and impatient, often selfish and for sure imperfect. And yet God sees something bigger, deeper, greater in each of them as they choose to let Him work thru them.
We often look at so many people just as Robb Stark looked at Walder Frey. We overlook or reject people because they do not fit into a certain box of what we think we are looking for or who we think we should associate with. We think we know who we can count on or the type of people we should invest in. And yet God looks at every person as someone He can work with, someone that has something someone else needs. God does not see any of us the same as we see one another. He does not rank and value us the way we rank and value potential people in our lives.
Be careful who you overlook or who you reject. They may not be a vicious, vengeful crazy man like Walder Frey, but they most certainly have something to offer and contribute and could make a bigger difference on your journey than you think. They may be the best ally you could hope for if only you will allow them.
In the end, after a few grumpy days of having to sit in the front seat of the bus, my middle school student has a different schedule at school. He now rides the bus at a different time of day when there are no other students aboard. But even so, his attitude is greatly changed and he enjoys chatting with me about upcoming movies. We may have gotten off to a rocky start but I think he realizes now that I was not the villain he thought I was. He has chosen to invest in an ally, rather than erect a wall.
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